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March 5, 2009

You are NOT afraid of the thing you are afraid of

Hello my friend:

It's time now to achieve some things you've wanted to do,
but haven't done.

Got a big goal?  A desire?  A dream?  A wish?

If you haven't done anything with it in some time or,
ever, it is because of one thing...

Fear.

"What?  Me?  Afraid?  You must not know me, I'm the queen
of mean (or the king of the hill). Nothing scares me...  I
just haven't had time."

Yeah, but... if you've dragged your heals on gettin'er
done, it is fear, not lack of time or lack of resources.
Maybe not the shaking in your boots, drooling kind of fear,
but it's fear, nonetheless.

And, frankly, in my life for the last 20+ years, if there
is something inside me that would prevent me from getting,
being or doing something pretty great, I want to exorcise
it.  Life's too short to be held back by anything,
especially being a scaredy cat.

So what is this thing, fear, that stops us and where does
it come from?

Well first, when you're afraid, you aren't afraid of the
thing you are afraid of.

(Nice Yogi-ism, huh?)

No.  What you are afraid of is either what would happen if
you fail, what you'd lose if you failed or how those things
would make you feel.

The things people are most afraid of are:

-- Looking silly or stupid and being laughed at
-- Humiliation, reputation ruined, being teased, being
   called names
-- Losing security (relationships, property, emotional
   security)
-- Ruining or changing a relationship
-- Losing money, liquidity, financial choices, security in
   retirement
-- Being injured, losing your health, physical pain
-- Getting in trouble, losing privileges or responsibilities
-- Harming your own self-image, thinking less of yourself
   than before a mistake

Who the hell wants any of that?

So the word fear, is sort of a misnomer.

Because avoiding those problems seems smart.  Right?

If you avoid these things throughout your life, you'd
probably feel like a genius. 

Right?

But you wouldn't be.

Because staying out of trouble can be good, but
frankly, the juice of life... the biggest rewards, the
greatest successes, the highest highs, the most thrilling
thrills come from doing things that have an element of risk
built into them.

For example, I do not gamble to any degree... 

I used to live in Reno, Nevada and honeymooned in Aruba,
where there are tons of casinos, and now live just a short
drive from the Turning Stone casino, where we see shows
regularly.  And in every gas station in the US, Lotto
beckons at every visit. Yet the extent of my gambling (and
losses) in my entire life total less than $100.

Because I just hate throwing money away for such a
miniscule chance that it will return anything.  The odds
are too great.

But in business, where the odds are better and the control
is higher, I've risked much and will continue to do so.

I've started, bought or managed many businesses and had to
make many decisions where the risks were high.

And yes, many did not paid off... I've personally lost, in
real dollars and lost revenues, over a million dollars in
my life.

But the ones that have paid off have brought in multiples
of the losses.  So I'm millions ahead. 

That never would have happened betting the horses, for
example.

I like the odds in business.  Because unlike Lotto or dice
or betting sports, you control it.  As you get smarter, I
can reduce my risks to near zero and increase my chances
for winning to near 100%.

But as in any area or role of life, if you can't stomach
the possibility of losing, or of making mistakes, or of
looking silly, of being criticized or laughed at, not only
will you never come close to your potential, but you can't
even truly be happy.

That's right...

Because with low expectations of yourself, you are open to
a lot of horrible emotions, like jealousy of those who have
or who are what you'd like to have or be... anger at those
same people... grieving and depression about what you've
missed out on... shyness around people you think are better
than you... resentment at those who "never gave you a
chance."

You know what?

No one has anything handed to them in life.

And those that do, piss it away most of the time.

So never be jealous of someone because they were "gifted"
a seemingly charmed life.  Because sooner or later, it all
evens out.  The people who have it too easy early in life
are usually the ones that can't do for themselves later
on... because they've never learned critically important
life lessons.  And they are miserable about it.  So never
wish for a risk-free life.  There is no such thing.
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The way to live today is as it always has been... you must
be able to take care of yourself.  It takes guts to set big
goals.  It takes big cojones to risk falling on your ass
and looking like an even bigger one, after you've told
other people about your fancy goals.

But that is what it takes today.

The old saying that you can't get to second base if you
won't take your foot off first is true in every part of life.

You don't get the date or the sale or the job unless you
ask...

You can't reach meaningful health goals unless you say
'no' to food that someone else made (and wants to guilt you
into eating it).

You can't win the gold unless you've eaten someone else's
dust in your climb to the top.

You can't be financially independent unless you "miss out"
on some things other people are doing.

You can't be well liked by many unless you "get out there."

Risk is your friend.

Mistakes will be made. 

Losses will occur.

Criticism is a certainty.

And it will all hurt... at least briefly.

But the pain of loss from going after what you want is
nothing like the pain you'll feel from procrastinating or
by doing things half way.

Yes, it's time now to achieve some things you've wanted to
do, but haven't done.

And if you are about to taking action (or even just think
about it) but feel the fear gripping you by the throat and
squeezing, then 'Releasing Fear Of Failure Now' will be
your best friend.

- http://www.thinkrightnow.com/a/rfof.asp 

Our latest, greatest Accelerated Success Conditioning
Program, 'Releasing Fear Of Failure Now' is designed to get
you to consciously alter the way you communicate with
yourself.

Because fear that stems from doubt comes not from innately
dangerous situations, most times.  It is often only the
result of your mind serving up pictures and affirmations
that you don't want to lose anything (see the list above
again).

Think about the people you admire the most.

See some faces. 

Think about their accomplishments.

Lack of fear.

If you want their kind of accomplishments, you need to
talk with yourself on an hourly basis like they talk to
themselves.  You need to have the same inner voice that
encourages them to encourage you.

Imagine when those people you admire the most need to make
a decision, and they don't hesitate, they just go ahead and
do the thing that would scare the living ***** out of you.

Imagine the mental pictures they have running through
their heads.  If you adopt those same pictures, you'll feel
as they do.

Imagine the conversations they have with themselves about
doing the things that made them who they are.  Have those
same powerful conversations with yourself and you will
become like they are.

No more hero worship.

Time to be the hero.

It's easy.

It's fast.

It's fun.

'Releasing Fear Of Failure Now' can teach you how.

If you put off important jobs, if you complain a lot, if
you are angry a lot, if you are sad a lot, then fear is
dominating your emotions and your life.

Learn how you can start being more brave, here:

- http://www.thinkrightnow.com/a/rfof.asp 

Take a chance,

Mike Brescia

PS:  We've had 'Releasing Fear Of Failure Now' discounted
way too long.  And so the price will go up next Friday...
the "scariest" day of the year.  Save now before the price
increase.
- http://www.thinkrightnow.com/a/rfof.asp

(c) copyright 2009 Think Right Now Int'l
- http://www.thinkrightnow.com
- http://www.instantinnerpower.com

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